Out the back

When you go through life with an open heart and an open mind, everyone is your teacher. Every person, every situation, every encounter, every choice, every moment changes you. Sometimes these moments teach us who we want to become and how we want to show up in the world. Some moments just as powerfully teach us who we don’t want to be.

In the world we live in, we have constant input and not a lot of time to filter and integrate. This is where we can run into trouble. It is through this filtering process that we decide if the information we have received is true for us. It is discernment.

Discerning is an adjective that comes from the Old French discerner, meaning to “distinguish (between), separate (by sifting).” I stole this definition right off the internet – vocabulary.com. If you have the ability to distinguish and sift, your life becomes your own. No longer are you tied to the opinions of others.

“But Julie, you just said at the top of this post that everyone is a teacher and everyone is a student. Now you say that their opinion doesn’t matter?”

Let me explain.

We all have an internal wisdom that is designed to propel us toward our best self. When you encounter people, situations, choices and moments, take it in and then discern if the thing is true for you. You keep what resonates and sift out what doesn't.

Most of this filtering happens without a thought. There is too much that comes in to process it all. It is the moments that come with much emotion, either positive or negative, that typically rise to the level of awareness. These are the things we talk to our friends about, the ones that keep us up at night and the ones that tug at our hearts.

There are people that I love, adore and respect in this world. They offer me their thoughts and opinions. I now have a decision to make. Will I accept this as true and change the course of my actions to reflect this input or will I filter it out? Even the people that I respect most get put through the filter because their life experience is not mine. If it resonates, it stays. If not, out the back of the truck.

Please note that this does not mean if someone says something you don’t like it automatically goes out the back of the truck. Some truth hurts. But it is still truth. Filter it.

Sometimes it neither stays or gets pushed out. I put it on a shelf. I know that I don’t quite grasp the significance, but it needs to stay until I make sense of it.

Let’s go back to last weeks PB&J. You come to me and ask me my opinion on the sandwich. Depending on my thoughts, experiences, beliefs etc., I will tell you what I think – “Throw the sandwich away! Sandwiches are gross!” If you are starving, you need to push that advice right out the back of the truck and eat the sandwich.

The bottom line. This is your life. At the end of the day, you live out your choices – not the person who is offering you opinions. Slow down, quiet your heart, discern, keep it, throw it or put it on a shelf and go live your beautiful life.